Roses In Winter
by twiniitowers
Summary: J-E fiction for all my Forbidden Shipper pals
1. If I Can't Have You

Note  
  
I know I already have 2 Jackie and Eric fan fics going, one is under another pseudonym. But I want to write another based on the shopping trip Eric and Jackie took in the season 6 episode, "Are You Sure It's Alright?"  
  
I don't write "R" rated sexual material, so I will leave that in the capable hands of other "'70s Show" author's. I haven't been inspired to write "'70s" fan fic for a very a long time. Thanks to those who have liked my stories in the past. I hope you like this one.~Carol  
  
Chapter 1 If I Can't Have You  
  
Scene 1 ~ Halverson's Department Store ~  
  
There he was all by himself in the mall on a Saturday afternoon clearly eyeing the cheapest tuxedo jackets. His eyes were downcast and his mind was elsewhere. For some odd reason she felt nervous to approach him. She dismissed it as being silly.  
  
"Hi, Eric."  
  
He turned around grateful to hear the sound of a happy female voice. "Hi, Jackie."  
  
"Why are you here on a Saturday afternoon?"  
  
"Because Donna didn't like the first tux I picked out and she gave me this list on what to look for." He handed her a piece of lined yellow paper.  
  
"You don't need a list," She crumbled it up and threw it on the floor, "You need Jackie!"  
  
He smiled. Jackie took command of the situation like she did the first time they were thrown together shopping and grabbed a black jacket that was more suitable for Eric's frame.  
  
"Here. Try this on."  
  
"Uh—Thanks," He looked at the price tag. He could not afford it and that was just the jacket let alone the trousers.  
  
"Don't worry about the cost."  
  
"Jackie, I can't ask you to—you already helped with making an engagement ring payment. And I still didn't pay you back for that."  
  
"Eric, don't worry about it. This tuxedo will be perfect on you. And grab the matching trousers in gray."  
  
There was something soothing about the older Jackie that he did his best to overlook. Five minutes later she walked into the men's dressing area and threw a vest over the doors.  
  
"Jackie! What are you doing outside?"  
  
"How else was I going to give you the vest?"  
  
"Okay. Will you go back outside the fitting room?"  
  
"No, I think I'll stay here. After all you're going to come out fully clothed."  
  
He waited for the remark about his scrawny body and was delightfully surprised that there was no burn.  
  
Three minutes later:  
  
"Does this meet with your approval?"  
  
"Oh my god—"  
  
"What?" Eric asked as he stood in front of the full-length mirror  
  
"You look very handsome."  
  
She fixed the shoulders and the back of the jacket like she did last time, but this time he had tingly in the pants feelings.  
  
"Tha—um, Jackie, I just remembered...I have to meet Donna for lunch..." He started to walk away.  
  
"Eric---you didn't change back into your clothes."  
  
"Oops. Sorry. Thanks for everything, Jackie. But I can't let you buy me this suit. I'll come back when I have some more money saved up." He went back into the dressing room.  
  
Jackie knew that there was no way that Eric could be having lunch with Donna because she had a Saturday afternoon class at Point Place Community College. He felt it too. Hey, she was Jackie Burkhart the prettiest girl in the land. She thought when did Eric get so hot? How come she didn't notice before? There was no point in this. She and Steven were an item and he was engaged to be married to her best friend. She wanted Eric Forman. Her boyfriends best friend and her best friends fiancée. Jackie ran out of the store surprised at the real tears that came out of her eyes.  
  
Scene 2 ~ Jackie's bedroom ~  
  
Jackie was doing what she did twice a year and that was sorting her daytime cosmetics from her nighttime cosmetics. Steven said he'd be over, but he was an hour late. He was probably sitting in the basement with Michael, Fez, and-----she let her mind wander, Eric. There was a knock on her bedroom door and her heart skipped a beat.  
  
"Hi, Jackie."  
  
"Hi, Donna!" 'Always be perky, you're Jackie Burkhart.'  
  
Donna threw her books on Jackie's dresser. "I'm sorry about that."  
  
"Is anything wrong?"  
  
"I send Eric to Halverson's to complete one SIMPLE little task and that dillhole wants to buy a tuxedo that's OUT of our price range."  
  
He didn't tell Donna that she was one that picked out that more expensive tuxedo and that she wanted to pay for it.  
  
"Donna," Jackie put her daytime lipsticks in her carrying case, "Don't you think you are being a little too hard on Eric?"  
  
"He knows we're on a budget, Jackie. Man, he's so immature at times. I wonder why I am marrying him."  
  
Jackie stood up, "I wonder why you are too."  
  
Before Donna could respond the phone rang and instead of grabbing the one in her room she ran once more to her mother's room not giving a damn if Donna stayed or if she left.  
  
Scene 3 ~ Eric's Basement ~ 12AM  
  
Hyde had to pull a late shift at the restaurant so Jackie figured it'd be okay to see how Eric was doing once she realized Donna had left his house for the night. For some reason that she couldn't explain she knocked on the door.  
  
"Come in," Eric said while reading the newspaper. He needed another job as working with Kelso and Hyde was getting to be a bother.  
  
"It's me, Jackie!" She exclaimed as she carried a metal tin.  
  
He let out a small laugh, "Why'd you knock?"  
  
"I didn't want to disturb you."  
  
"You're not. What's in the tin?"  
  
"I made you cookies."  
  
"You made me cookies?"  
  
"Well the dough was pre made."  
  
"Uh, thanks," She opened up the tin and handed it to him, "Why?"  
  
"Donna came by earlier and I got the feeling you didn't tell her about me meeting you in the store—so it was partly my fault that she yelled at you about the tuxedo being too expensive."  
  
"It wasn't your fault, Jackie."  
  
She was too nervous to sit down, "I guess I should be going.... I just wanted to make sure you were all right...and you obviously are...so----"  
  
"You sure you don't want to watch a movie with me?"  
  
It was the longest three seconds of Jackie Burkhart's life. Should she go or should she stay? What if Steven came home and saw her watching a movie with Eric? They'd get into a fight and she didn't want that to happen.  
  
"I better go, but thanks, Eric."  
  
"Thank you for the cookies."  
  
"You're welcome. Everyone could use a little Jackie Burkhart magic!"  
  
She ran and realized she ran away from the situation twice yesterday and once today. She couldn't keep doing this, but what choice did she have? When Jackie was gone Eric took the cookie tin upstairs to his room to put under his bed. That's all Hyde had to see. He realized when he passed Red and Kitty asleep on the sofa in front of the TV that they were right all along. He was too young to be married. He took off his sneakers and threw himself on top of his bed realizing that the choices he made now were going to affect the rest of his life. All he could do at that moment was turn off the light.  
  
Scene 4 ~ The Forman Kitchen ~ 12PM  
  
Jackie was relieved to see Steven in the kitchen by himself eating a sandwich Kitty had made him before she went to the hospital to start her work shift.  
  
"Where's Red?" She asked  
  
"He and Forman went somewhere. Would you get me another Coke out of the fridge, doll?"  
  
Jackie rolled her eyes as she went to refrigerator to get her boyfriend a soda.  
  
"Steven, we need to talk." She pulled up a chair  
  
"Uh god...what's on your mind, Jackie?"  
  
"I think we should stop seeing each other..."  
  
"Do you want to get back with Kelso?" He looked at her with disappointed eyes.  
  
"No! Steven, I'm unhappy with how it's going on with us and I just think we should break up."  
  
"No, Jackie! You wouldn't be saying this unless there was another man. Who is it? And even if you don't tell me I will find out and kick his ass!"  
  
"There is NO other guy," Jackie stood up determined not to run anymore, "I don't love you anymore, Steven. I thought I did, but I didn't."  
  
Hyde got up, "I never should have gone out with you. You are a f***ing bitch." and he walked out of the kitchen loudly opening the swinging door.  
  
Jackie didn't want to cry, but she couldn't help it. She couldn't reveal her feelings to Eric now. Hyde would kill him for certain. But there was one thing she could do and that was walk not run out of the Forman house. What was she going to do? She knew she couldn't come back here anymore. She knew she couldn't talk to Donna without losing it completely. And she couldn't see Eric anymore. When she got to the corner and was able to duck in one of the back alley's she sat on a stoop with her hands over her face and cried over the dreams that she was not allowed to have.  
  
Scene 5 ~ Back alley ~  
  
"Jackie, what's wrong?" Fez asked her as he sucked a grape lollipop.  
  
"Fez," She dried her eyes, "What are you doing in back alleys?"  
  
"Looking for love in all the wrong places."  
  
"Oh," she let out a small laugh, pissed off at herself that she couldn't be perky in public, "Fez, can you do me a favor?"  
  
"Sure. Sit on Fez' lap."  
  
She punched him in the arm. "Not that, you pig! Tell him, I'm very sorry."  
  
She was certain that the message would get to Eric somehow but she knew that falling in love with Eric Forman would cause too many problems and that it was best to ask her Mom if she could stay with one of her aunts in New York. She ignored Fez' sexual needs talk as she tried to hold her head up high and walk the long way home trying to convince herself that she was doing the right thing where everybody was concerned. Hopefully, he'd at least have the good sense not to marry Donna. She was controlling and poison and Eric Forman deserved better than Donna Pinciotti. He deserved the wonderful and stunning Jackie Burkhart. But that such as a rose that blooms in the winter snow could never be. 


	2. Jackie's Gone

Chapter 2  
  
Jackie's Gone  
  
What a strange day at work Eric thought as he took off his red velvet jacket and bow tie and placed them on top of the dryer in the basement. Hyde and Kelso did not come in today. That left Roy an even more nervous wreck trying to call one of the first shift people to do the cooking and Eric having to do Kelso's job on top of his own. It was actually good to be at work and not think about other things. Other people. Other people known as Jackie. The only person that was here was sitting in the dark before Eric had turned the light on was Fez.  
  
"Fez, why were you sitting in the dark, man?" Eric turned on the old TV before sitting on the sofa.  
  
"Because my soul is dark."  
  
The last thing Eric wanted to do at midnight was try to decipher one of Fez' horny riddles.  
  
"Why's that?"  
  
"Jackie's gone."  
  
Eric stood up, "Gone? What do you mean, Jackie's gone?"  
  
"She told me to tell Hyde that she's very sorry and when I came back here. I heard Miss Kitty talking* on the phone with Pam that Jackie is staying in New York with one of her aunt's. And that makes Fez sad."  
  
'F***'  
  
"Where are Hyde and Kelso?"  
  
"I don't know, I haven't seen them all day."  
  
Eric didn't mean to be a bad friend to Fez by ignoring him and running up the stairs but he had to talk to his mother.  
  
"Mom," Eric barged in his parent's room and turned on the light.  
  
"This better be important or my foot is going to go up your ass."  
  
"Eric," Kitty rubbed her eyes, "What's wrong, sweetie? Are you sick?"  
  
"No. What's this about Jackie going to New York?"  
  
"You woke me up out of a sound sleep for THAT?!" Red barked  
  
Eric was this close to telling his father to shut up, but he didn't feel like dealing with the consequences of telling Red off at the moment.  
  
"She and Steven broke up----can't we talk about this in the morning?"  
  
"Sure." There was no more information to be found here.  
  
"And tell the foreign kid to go home!" Red yelled before going back to sleep.  
  
"Yeah, yeah."  
  
Eric had to go to the one place he really didn't want to go to. But if anyone could shed some light on what happened today it would be Donna.  
  
"Eric," Donna came downstairs in her white tank top and plaid sweat pants, "Are you----what's wrong?"  
  
"What's this about Jackie going to New York?"  
  
"Why do you care?" She raised an eyebrow  
  
"Are you going to let me in?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"What's going on?" Called Bob from his room.  
  
"Nothing, Dad. It's only Eric."  
  
'It's only Eric.' How could he marry a woman who thought of him like that?  
  
"I care because Jackie is OUR friend."  
  
"She just told her Mom she needed to get away since breaking up with Hyde."  
  
"And that's another thing. Hyde and Kelso were not at work today. Did they get into it?"  
  
"Why are you making this your problem?"  
  
"They're my friends, too, geez, Donna."  
  
"I haven't seen Hyde nor Kelso all day. And you should be in bed. We have to pick out our wedding invitations in twelve hours."  
  
"Don't you care if Jackie is all right?"  
  
"I care, Eric," She sighed heavily, "I'm sure she's fine. Now go home and get some sleep." She lightly pecked him on the cheek and pushed him out the front door.  
  
"Is that you Forman or is it Dorothy Hamill?" A drunken Hyde fell at his feet near the basement entrance.  
  
"What happened to you, man?"  
  
"That f***ing bitch dumped me."  
  
Eric repressed the urge to beat the crap out of his best friend for saying such cruel words about Jackie but managed with the goodness he had in his heart to help Hyde up.  
  
"Where's Kelso?"  
  
"I have no idea." Eric helped his friend back into the basement where Fez took the other side and they put him on his bed.  
  
"Jackie's in New York with one of her aunt's."  
  
"Good. I hope she rots there."  
  
"You don't mean that about the sweet Jackie." Fez said  
  
"The hell I don't."  
  
"She said to tell you that she's very sorry."  
  
That's when Eric caught his reflection in the mirror and realized that sentence was not for Hyde but for himself.  
  
"I hope she gets run over by a train."  
  
"Okay, buddy," Eric raised his voice, "That's quite enough."  
  
Hyde would have had a comeback remark if it weren't for the fact that he passed out.  
  
"Oh, Fez, my Dad wants you to go home."  
  
"See you tomorrow, Eric."  
  
Eric went back to sit on his spot on the sofa and needed to see Kelso before figuring out what he was going to do.  
  
Upstate New York  
  
Jackie looked at herself in the mirror and hated how she looked. She didn't change out of yesterday's clothes, her make up was smeared, and her hair unkempt. This wasn't show All American Miss Popular Girl Jackie Burkhart was supposed to look. Jackie was in a hurry when she packed her things and didn't bring her department store skin care products with her so she was appalled that she had to use plain old soap on her young face. This really was for the best, she decided as she turned on the sink. Hyde and Eric's friendship would have blown up if she stayed in Point Place and maybe Eric would cancel the engagement. It would be quite empowering if he did it first instead of waiting for Donna to lower the axe. Jackie lathered the soap all over her face and rinsed with the tepid water before toweling her face dry. The happiness was gone and she felt herself look average. She hoped her mother would call Point Place High School to explain her absence and that she was going to finish her high school at Lincoln High. It really bothered her that her and Eric were building on something they have been teasing each other for years with their veiled insults that over time unbeknownst in their consciousnesses that a friendship was forming. It really bothered her that they were building on something that could not be acted upon. Besides maybe it was just an infatuation with Eric. She went from Michael to Steven no problem. What if Eric was part of the cycle she put herself in? He wasn't a cheater like Michael and he wasn't off putting like Steven. But still they probably would have broken up and all that would be left would be to f*** Fez and then she'd have screwed all male members of the basement gang. That would've made her just as much as a whore as Laurie. Jackie opened up her purse that was on the clothes hamper and took out her light pink blusher it was the first time in what seemed like a long time that she had no interest to put her make up on.  
  
"Jackie!" Her aunt called up "Dinner's ready!"  
  
"Coming." She yelled back.  
  
'Yes. It's for the best.'  
  
If there was one thing you could say about Michael Kelso is that he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. Eric found him in the basement at nine o'clock in the morning taking an orange popsicle out of the deep freeze. He looked like the same doofus who although had a pregnant girlfriend would still cheat on Brooke if the opportunity presented itself. He flirted with all the 'hot chicks' at the restaurant. This wasn't going to take long not only because Eric didn't want to waste his time talking to Kelso but Donna was going to find him and make sure he didn't miss agreeing with her on the invitations that she wanted to pick out. It was laughable to think he had a say in the planning of his own wedding.  
  
"Hey, Kelso."  
  
"These generic popsicles suck! When does your dad go back to work?"  
  
"Right. Did Hyde accuse you of having an affair with Jackie?"  
  
Kelso wasn't black and blue and he figured Hyde would beat up any guy he thought put the moves on Jackie and that included ex-boyfriend Michael Kelso. Especially ex-boyfriend Michael Kelso. That would have been the first person Hyde would have suspected.  
  
"No. And I'm insulted man, because hey look at my body! If you were a woman you'd have sex with me, Eric."  
  
"Shouldn't you be thinking about Brooke?"  
  
Eric walked away but didn't get very far when Donna was waiting for him by the Vista Cruiser.  
  
"The store doesn't open until 10." Eric reminded.  
  
She put her arms around him and pulled him close, "I know I've been bitchy lately...."  
  
'Really? I didn't notice.'  
  
"Really."  
  
"And I'm sorry, Eric. I'm just stressed out what with school and planning our wedding."  
  
They shared a kiss and that's when Eric realized it was different. That kiss was devoid of passion. Okay he and Donna have been friends for eons and he should have realized that when they got together they were just kids. It might have been because Red chipped away at his self esteem while Kitty smothered him to make up for it that he never saw who was right under his nose the whole time. Jackie. She wasn't the same annoying girl that first came into his life because she and Kelso were an item. She was different now. She was grown up, beautiful, and confident. Now she was somewhere in New York because she didn't want to cause any trouble. She didn't want him and Hyde to end their friendship and she didn't want to cause any grief to him and Donna.  
  
"What's on your mind, Eric?"  
  
"Donna, I have something to tell you."  
  
"Sure. What is it?"  
  
"I'm very sorry, but I cannot marry you."  
  
*When Kitty came home from work. 


	3. Spring Is In The Air

Chapter 3  
  
Spring is in the Air  
  
Eric couldn't stand living at home and having to hear his father who was just a bitter angry old man tell him 'I told you so'. Of course those weren't the exact words Red Forman said but all Eric could do was suck it in. Since Red was on sick leave and no longer the day manager Eric was able to work at Pricemart again because Red's supervisor Ted thought Eric was a reliable worker and was certainly nicer than his father. Donna transferred to New York University to major in journalism. It irked him that he didn't cry over her leaving. They shared too many memories, good and bad, for him not to feel any kind of emotion. But sometimes in the middle of the night when he couldn't sleep he did cry over Jackie Burkhart. He couldn't even inquire to Bob about Jackie because Pam predictably moved on and went on a vacation in the Bahamas. He was angry that there was no college fund as Red's medical insurance from Pricemart ran out and they had to use his college fund without his consent to pay his doctor's bills. He also stopped hanging in the basement anymore. He never wanted Hyde to know his feelings for Jackie, Kelso and Brooke were in a constant state of mess, and Fez was thinking about moving to Los Angeles to get it on with the Hollywood whores. There was nothing to do but work and get wasted on the times he did hang out with Hyde. When all he wanted to do was have a chance with Jackie.  
  
Jackie hated Lincoln High School. She didn't want a gaggle of superficial cheerleading friends named Tiffany, Heather, and Amber. She couldn't shake Eric from her memory. Yet it was easier to put Michael and Steven behind her and she had a sexual relationship with them! She found a clothing store in the local mall to work in which was better paying and better smelling then the Cheese Palace. Granted Jackie was not going to wear those cheaply made garments but she could convince other women not as glamorous as she that they were indeed fabulous pieces of clothing. She had to get Eric out of her mind. She blew it big time. She should have said that the plane ticket to California was a bad idea. Because if the situation were reversed Jackie knew that Donna would not have disobeyed Bob and went to California to get her boyfriend back. Maybe she could join the cheerleading squad to take off her mind off things. It wasn't just Eric. She found out from her aunt that her mom broke up with Bob and went on vacation (i.e. a drinking binge) in the Bahamas. God only knows when her mother would be returning to Point Place. Her father was in prison and even if Jackie wanted to go home, something she wasn't about to entertain until she graduated. Who wanted to wander around in a big old empty house? She wrote J.B. heart E.F. on the margins of her notebook. She had to stop the thought. Damn her. Damn Eric. Damn Donna. Damn Steven. Damn Michael. Damn her parents!  
  
"Jackie," she was never unprepared in school before. "Is there something that you'd like to share with the class?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Then go up the blackboard when you are called."  
  
'Dumbass'.  
  
She missed Red. He was like a father to her and that was even before her Daddy went to prison. She didn't like how he verbally put Eric down, but she still missed his presence. Besides she could tell that deep down that he really loved his son. She missed having an older man around. She missed Kitty and the wonderful scents of something baking in the oven coming from the Forman kitchen. Even when Kitty was going through her menopausal mood swings at least she was there and not off in Cancun getting wasted with the hotel pool boy. But most of all she missed Eric. Maybe it was all in her head. She kept trying to reason within herself that it was just an infatuation and apart from her killer body she couldn't picture Eric actually loving her. He probably was going to marry the lumberjack! The bell rang and she didn't finish the math problem.  
  
"Where do you think you are going, Jackie?"  
  
"To my next class---"  
  
"Not until you finish."  
  
'Dumbass!'  
  
Finally. Eric put the smaller box on top of the larger ones and closed the door. He got out from under his parents thumbs. He made the big move to Madison. Where he and Donna were supposed to be not even a year ago. Hyde, the selfish s.o.b. didn't offer to help him move. Thank god Jackie had the good sense to break up with that loser! Fez did offer to help Eric until he saw the ad in the newspaper for the Halverson Girl model search. Guess where he was going to be spending his Friday night? He stretched out on the pre owned sofa. It was an ugly shade of mustard yellow, but it was here and free. He thought about going to 'get Jackie'. But there was only one thing stopping him. He did it before. Granted, Jackie was not Donna she was more beautiful and probably more intelligent because she didn't foam at the mouth and declare that all men were pigs. Jackie saw the balance, but even so he couldn't go after her. Not after what happened with Donna. Maybe it was just 'transference'. He couldn't risk going after someone again only to get his heart broken again. He didn't have to go to work tomorrow so the only thing he could do at the moment was to find a bar and get blindingly drunk. How could you recover from a woman you never kissed? A woman you never made love with? Maybe his father was right and he was a dumbass after all. He had many opportunities to be with Jackie and whether it was because of stupid high school clique labels or what not he still messed up. Damn it. She was too beautiful to forget.  
  
1 week later  
  
Jackie was surprised that she got thee phone call. Well not thee phone call, but she was still surprised to hear who was on the other side of the phone.  
  
"Hi, Jackie."  
  
"Um, Hi, Donna. How did you find me?"  
  
"Your Mom came back from the Bahamas while I was visiting my Dad."  
  
And how 'great' it was for Donna to know that and not her. Pam was her mother for god's sake!  
  
"She did?"  
  
"You didn't know?"  
  
"NO! So, are you calling to check up on me? Because, I'm fine. Although it think it's best that you look for another maid of honor."  
  
"You don't know?" Donna made it a question  
  
"I don't know what?"  
  
"Eric and I are no longer together."  
  
'YES!' Jackie's heart exclaimed and then she thought it was a shallow victory because it's not like she could be with him.  
  
"What happened? What did Eric do now?" She tried not to put any unnecessary emphasis on her words.  
  
"He was the one who broke up with me."  
  
'Really?'  
  
"Really? I'm sorry."  
  
"Well, I was having my doubts too. I'm glad he 'fessed up. I'm doing great at NYU."  
  
"Eric moved out of his parents house and went to Madison. He's back at Pricemart."  
  
"He should be in college."  
  
"Those are his choices, Jackie," Donna felt an uncomfortable shift in their conversation and decided to turn the tables around, "I thought you and Hyde were going to last."  
  
"Whatever gave you that idea? He doesn't know what he wants. Maybe it's not my place to say, Donna, but you hurt Eric. He really loved you until you wore his spirit down to his core that there was nothing left to feel but resentment."  
  
It was the most mature thing Jackie Burkhart had ever said in her young life.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"You know what? F*** this. I might as well tell you since nothing is going to come of it, but I love Eric Forman, yeah I said it."  
  
She laughed in spite of herself as she hung up the phone leaving Donna speechless.  
  
The days started to meld into one another as if you were in a world void of calendars and clocks. Eric was still a Pricemart stock boy. He felt he should be a manager trainee. It was terrible work but he had to rent to pay and there was no way he was going to come back to 416 as a failure. It disturbed him that Red would love throwing it in his face and Kitty would love having her "sweet baby boy" back in the nest. How dare he leave in the first place? He was almost taken aback when Hyde was standing next to the pet supplies.  
  
"Relax, Erica. Even though I should kick your ass."  
  
"Hyde, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be elsewhere?"  
  
"I heard something interesting, Forman."  
  
Eric put the last of the squeaky dog toys on the shelf.  
  
"You know that I have feelings for Jackie don't you?"  
  
"I should kick your ass."  
  
"We didn't do anything, Hyde. So, how do you know?"  
  
"Donna told me."  
  
"It's a moot point. It's not like we're going to be together. And I don't know what's worse? If you were here to kick my ass or if you wanted to get us together. "  
  
"Trust me kicking your ass would be worse."  
  
"And I should be kicking your ass for calling Jackie a f***ing bitch."  
  
"I was drunk."  
  
"Not the first time you called her that."  
  
"How did you know about that?"  
  
"I know now."  
  
A little trick he learned from Red.  
  
"Man, what a dillhole you are."  
  
"So, what was your purpose of this little visit, Hyde?"  
  
"You know what, Forman? You deserve to be alone because you just don't get it."  
  
Eric supposed Hyde was right on the second part of his sentence. He didn't get it. There was no rhyme or reason to Hyde's visit. Was it an intimidation game of sorts? He certainly didn't want Hyde's help in winning Jackie's heart. One thing was for certain he didn't deserve to be alone. No one did. Especially Jackie.  
  
1 Month Later  
  
Jackie had to do it. She just had to. It would be so romantic just like a scene out of a movie or out of her favorite romance novel. She took some time off from her mall job since her school was closed for Spring break and she took the first bus to Wisconsin. Now that Donna and Eric were no longer an item and now that Steven could spend the rest of his life like Michael pining away for her she could take the risk because she knew Eric was too heartbroken over Donna to risk it all. She wore her light blue dress with the yellow flowers on it and her Mary Jane wedges to make her somewhat taller. It felt good to put on her make up and her accessories. She almost cursed when the cab driver almost drove past Pricemart and quickly breathed deeply when he did a U-Turn to enter the parking lot. She didn't see his Vista Cruiser in the lot. But if Eric moved out of his parent's house then maybe he bought his own car. She almost mowed over a little old lady to get to the automatic opening door. She ran to the customer service desk plowing herself into the counter and out of breath.  
  
"May I help you?" the girl behind the counter asked with no interest.  
  
"Can you page Eric Forman and tell him Jackie Burkhart is here to see him?"  
  
"He doesn't work here anymore."  
  
Jackie's heart sank down to the pit of her stomach.  
  
"What do you mean he doesn't work here anymore? He just started working here again."  
  
"He quit."  
  
"Does he still live in Madison or is he back at home?"  
  
"I'm sorry, Miss. I cannot give out that information."  
  
Jackie ran back outside with tears the size of good quality diamonds running down her cheeks.  
  
"E—Eric,"  
  
She could put a dime in the pay phone and call his parents to find out where Eric was. No. She couldn't do that. He was trying to move on. It was hard getting over Jackie Burkhart. Eric was trying to move on even if it meant denying his feelings. Whether he still lived in Madison or back in Point Place it wouldn't change those facts. She knew that she too had to move on. Move on past girly crushes. She was going to be graduating school in June. Eric needed to be in college and maybe that's where he was going to or already was. Jackie would just be a distraction. Granted a killer distraction, but a distraction nonetheless. Eric deserved his future most of all and unlike Donna or his parents she would never deny him of that. 


	4. Echoes of Loneliness

Chapter 4  
  
Echoes of Loneliness  
  
(note—I don't want to make this story too long, so that is why I'm going to jump time.)  
  
4 Years Later  
  
Los Angeles July 1983  
  
Jackie Burkhart's life:  
  
Jackie was beyond angry when she found out both her mother and father squandered her college fund for their own materialistic purposes. She graduated from Lincoln High in the spring of '79, quit her job at the clothing store, and took what savings she did have to start her life in California. There were men but they were all short relationships for the sole purpose of not having to sleep alone. She didn't love any of her suitors. As time passed her thoughts of Eric were less and less. Sometimes when she'd see "Star Wars" on TV or saw someone driving the streets of LA in a beat up old station wagon she thought of him. She could easily have picked up the phone and called his parents. But what would be the point of that? She was a model spokeswoman for one of the local television talent shows. Men oohed and awed her in her revealing sequined dresses. She was beginning to feel like a shadow of her former self. That looks and possessions didn't matter. There would always be a man in her bed, but not one that would really love her. For her. Jackie hoped that Eric was happy and hopefully did not get back together with Donna in a moment of weakness. Her alarm went off at six am and she pressed the snooze bar for five more minutes. There was no one to surprise her with coffee and pastry in bed. There was an empty vase on her stereo speaker with no single red rose for her that symbolized her life ever since she realized that she loved Eric Forman. She groaned when her alarm went off again. She had to get to the TV studio earlier than usual. It was her dream to be a model. Now she didn't care. She just didn't care. It was a job to pay her bills and to keep her mind occupied. It was the first time that she thought of herself as an adult. Because she was miserable and that was the first sign that you entered adulthood that you left your dreams behind as the echoes of loneliness washed over your soul. The only thing left for her to do was to wait for her turn to die.  
  
Philadelphia, PA July 1983  
  
Eric Forman's life:  
  
Eric couldn't believe his parents. The moment he decides to quit Pricemart and announce that he wanted to move out of state it seemed that Red's health improved ten fold. They would be none too happy to pay for his education provided he find a part time job to help with some of the expenses. It was very scary at first because Eric realized when he went home to tell his parents this that he had spent all of his life chasing Donna and not giving a thought to what he wanted to do. What he could be good at. He graduated from Drexel University with a degree in Electrical Engineering and had a job in a typical glass and steel building. The money was good but he lonely on the inside. There was no serious girlfriend in Eric Forman's life except for some late night party girls that only wanted one thing. He tried to forget all about what could've been with Jackie Burkhart. It wasn't easy. She was quite the force to be reckoned with. It was easier getting over Donna than it was Jackie and they never kissed each other let alone had a sexual relationship! He wondered what she looked like now four years later and in her prime? There was no knowledge on her whereabouts when he went home for the holidays. Those awkward holiday dinners with Donna and Bob at the dining room table the only thing that could have made them worse would be if Laurie and Hyde showed up. Laurie was in St. Louis and on her second husband and no one knew where Hyde was. Eric thought maybe New York City. He could've sworn he thought he saw someone that looked like him when he went to a concert at Madison Square Garden a year ago. Donna was a globe trotting journalist and very happy. Rumor had it she was going to bring a boyfriend to the next family gathering. Oh, Eric couldn't wait to see that! He didn't have to go into work today so he didn't have to force himself to get out of bed. He turned on the TV; he finally broke down and got cable, what else was there to do when there was no soul mate, no great love in the bed next to you? Eric snuggled into his blanket it might have been sixty degrees outside but his bedroom was cold. He closed his eyes as the guy was selling a miracle juicer and for the next five hundred callers a free set of carving knives! He thought he was dreaming when he heard HER voice.  
  
"This is Jackie Burkhart and you're watching KCAL channel 9!"  
  
"What?"  
  
Eric opened up his eyes and the image was gone. He had to be imagining things as the morning news program started. He sank even deeper into the covers. His never felt so lonely before. His heart was an empty shell. He could hear the echoes of loneliness wash over his soul. The only thing left for him to do was to wait for his turn to die. 


	5. LA Lady

Chapter 5  
  
LA Lady  
  
August 1983  
  
When Jackie saw it she had to have it. When she was window shopping during one of her workday lunch hours she saw the painting in the gallery shop window. It was a painting done in 1980 by living artist Francis Scott. The scene was an open bedroom window complete with flowing ivory curtains, which reminded her of the Seals and Crofts song "Summer Breeze" and there on the edge of the soft pastel pink and green toned bed linen in vibrant ruby red were two perfect red roses intertwined within each other. The leaves and thorns on the stem uncut as two half-empty crystal champagne flutes rested on the bedroom end table. You didn't need to see the couple to know that they were in love's rapture. The fact that you didn't see them represented in the painting meant they could be whoever you crystallized them in your mind to be. It hung above her white fireplace. When she was thirteen she always wanted a glorious self-portrait hanging above her fireplace and now she realized how immature and self-important that was. She couldn't imagine another painting above her fireplace than the implication of a content and wonderful love. It's all she had. Jackie was coerced into going on a double date tonight with one of her girlfriends from work. "He won't go out with me, unless we can double date." Jackie's first thought was what kind of man is that? But there was nothing else to do. She could show off her new sapphire blue dress to her friend just as she could order the most expensive thing off the restaurant menu. It dawned on Jackie that she has been pretty much faking her normally perky self for four years now. No one knew the real Jackie Burkhart and they weren't going to.  
  
Jackie's date was named Erik with a 'K' had the man's name been Michael or Steven she wouldn't have felt the need to go home and pull a Sylvia Plath. This Erik was walking sneezing and wheezing allergy case that she felt she was secretly filming a lame comedy series pilot. He spent most of the night in the restroom, which was fine by her. She cut her lobster in small pieces but hardly took any bites. The sound of the band on the dance floor was giving her a migraine. She felt the people whispering were talking about her. Jackie bolted up from the table.  
  
"Are you okay?" asked her work friend  
  
"Yes," she grabbed her sequined evening bag that matched her dress, "Yes."  
  
She didn't want anyone to know her business as she ran out of the restaurant. She could have used the guest phone but somehow it was more romantic and a page ripped out of the latest best seller. She took her phone card out of her purse. Someone had to make the first move. She could take the next plane out and be in his arms within a matter of hours!  
  
"Hello. This is the Forman residence. Sorry we are not home to take your call. Please leave your name and number after the beep and we'll get back to you as soon as possible." She ended with her trademark laugh.  
  
Answering machine!  
  
Jackie was about to hang up but she put the receiver back to her ear.  
  
"Hello, Mrs. Forman. This is Jackie Burkhart. Please tell----"  
  
The damn thing cut her off. She quickly dialed again.  
  
"give Eric my phone number. It is (310)----"  
  
Beep!  
  
"F***!"  
  
They must have purchased the most inexpensive answering machine that they could find as she quickly dialed again.  
  
"555-5317. Tell Eric I want to speak to him soon!"  
  
It was corny and rushed but she had to get beat the answering machine. She left her evening wrap on the chair at the restaurant but she didn't care. The only thing that she cared about was hailing a taxi and waiting for Eric with a C's call.  
  
Later  
  
Jackie fell asleep at her kitchen table. She was still dressed in her dark blue albeit wrinkled vision of loveliness. An empty teacup lie on its side by her ear. The phone rang at 1:05am. Finally! After all these years!  
  
"E-Eric Forman*," she was surprised at her own shaky voice, "How are you?"  
  
"Who is Eric Forman?"  
  
It was her work friend. "Never mind. What do you want?"  
  
"You left your wrap at the restaurant."  
  
"You called for that?"  
  
"Not really, Jackie. Erik likes you."  
  
"Well I don't like Erik," she sighed, "With a K."  
  
"Actually my real reason for calling is our Las Vegas meet and greet has been pushed up to tomorrow—well actually today. We have to be at the airport in two hours."  
  
Jackie slid down the wall almost disconnecting the telephone. She didn't know whether to cry or laugh. It's not like her job allowed her to play hooky. She was the number one spokes model. What was she doing? It was better when she tried to push Eric out of her mind. Maybe the non-ringing phone meant that he wasn't interested anymore? He could've been married with two small happy babies. He himself might be happy. She said her 'see ya later' goodbye to her work friend and slowly got up to run to her bedroom to pack a quick suitcase. It was time to let these unrequited feelings for Eric go as her magnificent painting looked on.  
  
It was four in the morning when Eric stumbled into his apartment. He had one too many at the bar tonight. He looked forward to his play nights when he could drink a little and f*** a lot. He tripped over his life-size Yoda statue. His answering machine light was blinking. It was his Mother.  
  
"No-t---t—oday, K-kitty," he groaned as he deleted her message mid sentence.  
  
Eric never made it to his bedroom as he passed out on the floor.  
  
Jackie needed that shower. It rejuvenated her as she had to be 'perky Jackie' when she was out in the public eye. She was about to get dressed, as she had to be at the airport in a few minutes when the phone rang. Her first thought was not of Eric this time but her work friend probably to remind her to bring the latest magazines and trashy novels to read on the airplane.  
  
"Hello?" Jackie asked  
  
"Hello, Jackie, it's me Mrs. Forman."  
  
"Hi, how are you?"  
  
"Okay. Red and I just got back from our dinner and movie date."  
  
And the other thing that would be happening as soon as Kitty got off the telephone.  
  
"How is Mr. Forman?"  
  
"Good. I got him to fix the settings on the answering machine so people can leave longer messages. I called Eric---"  
  
"You did? How is he?"  
  
"I wouldn't know. I got his machine."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"I gave him your phone number."  
  
Jackie looked at her clock and realized that it was quite late at least for people Red and Kitty's age. She didn't want to keep Kitty on the phone.  
  
"Thanks. I better let you go...."  
  
She could've inquired about Eric but chose to leave the matter rest and she said her quick goodbye's before Kitty could say any more. She made a mistake calling the Forman's. It was a moment of weakness. Jackie noted that Eric couldn't possibly be married because Kitty probably never would have given Eric her phone number otherwise.  
  
"Bye, Mrs. Forman."  
  
That was the end of that. In less than twelve hours Jackie would be signing 8X10 glossies of herself and posing for pictures for a bunch of horny middle aged married men who fantasized about leaving their nagging wives for a hot young tomato like her. Jackie finished her packing when a large jolt scared the hell out of her. Her first thought was 'earthquake'. She survived two of them already and that was one of the few things she hated about California.  
  
"What in the Hell?"  
  
Her painting fell off the wall. The frame broke and shards of glass were around the fireplace. She was going to have to tell maintenance to clean this mess up.  
  
"Oh," Jackie's heart pierced as she noticed the two perfect intertwined roses on the bed were separated thanks to the piece of glass from the frame that cut through them as if they didn't matter.  
  
She put on her camel colored coat and grabbed her suitcase and purse before turning off the lights. She had a plane to catch.  
  
Special thanks to Jaded Angel—I'm very glad that you are liking this story. I just wanted to say thank you very much for your positive reviews.  
  
*Corrected Jackie's quote to say "Eric Forman" since her 'date' was named Erik.~Carol 


	6. Chicago My Kind of Town

**Let's try to finish this. :)  
**

**Late August 1983**

**Chapter 6**

**Chicago (My Kind of Town)***

Eric had 2 weeks paid vacation and decided to numb his soul by being preoccupied by the annual Star Wars

convention. He just saw the final installment _Return of the Jedi_, when it opened this past May. Everything was

tied neatly with a bow, Luke and Leia were siblings, Darth Vader was their father, and Luke redeemed his

father's soul by killing his evil alter ego so he could look upon his son with his own dying eyes.

He purchased an R2-D2 watch, a few comic books, and he almost went for another life sized statue, he had the

money, he might as well spend it, but the Chicago Hyatt in Rosemont, Illinois was too suffocating, he needed a

good home cooked meal by Kitty, some small talk with Red (how they were able to advance to that level still

mystified the younger Forman), and relax in the basement while he watched monotonous sitcoms on the

television.

"You must be hungry." Kitty said to Eric when she opened the door.

"Why do you say that, Mom?"

"Because you don't visit as often as you should!"

But she nervously laughed her emotions off and hugged her son.

"I'm sorry about that, but now that you mention it, I am starving…."

"We had roast beef last night, would you like a sandwich?"

"Yes."

The calendar might have stated 1983, but the furniture was still the same, the gold sofa, Red's soothing

pea-soup color recliner, it was like walking into a time warp, that if he closed his eyes and thought hard enough

he'd go downstairs and everyone would be in the basement. Jackie would be in the basement with no romantic

feelings for Kelso and Hyde, but for him.

_Only him. _

"Where's Dad?"

Eric sat at his place at the kitchen table as Kitty poured him an iced-tea

"At the store. What's new with you?"

"Now you want to talk…." Kitty went to the cupboard to get a steak knife to cut the rolls in half, "Speaking of

talking, did you call Jackie?"

"What?" He almost spit out his iced tea.

"Jackie called me last month and gave me her number, I left a message on your machine….."

_and I deleted your message,_

_because I am a dumbass!_

Eric stood up like he needed to evacuate the house; the need to eat was gone.

"Mom! What's Jackie's number? I am the most stupid man in the world!"

Eric was glad the house was free of a Kelso, Hyde, and Fez who only would have made fun of him.

"Eric, calm down, it's in my address book in the desk draw -"

But that's all Eric had to hear as he sprinted off into the living room, nearly spraining his ankle in the process.

Kitty smiled as she went upstairs, past Eric, to put the sheets on the beds.

"Mom, where is," Eric pulled the maroon colored address book out of the top drawer, "Found it! I'm going

upstairs to use that phone…"

"That won't be necessary, Eric,"

He felt his whole body tingle with electricity, as he was almost afraid to turn around.

"J-Jackie? What are you doing here?"

She was beyond beautiful in an amethyst colored dress.

"I was in the mood for your Mom's cooking and I needed a break from work -"

"So did I."

"Jackie, I/Eric, I"

"No, you/no, you."

"Jinx, buy me a Coke/Jinx, buy me a Coke."

Eric sighed and remembered his Red's talk about him being a gentleman or his ass would be kicked to the moon.

"Hi, Jackie."

"Hi, Eric."

"Did my Mom see you?" he asked if he were underage, but Kitty would always be his Mom.

"Yes, that's why she went upstairs and I think we are spending way too much time talking…."

"You left Point Place because you had feelings for me."

"Ssh," she put her finger on his lips, she never thought he'd be the more talkative one, "It's 1983 and a new

start."

_This was the best kiss ever!_

Jackie put her hands on Eric's shoulders as she came up for air, "Let's go the basement!"

Wow. Eric has changed a lot since Jackie had her last front porch conversation with Donna on the topic of sex

with boyfriends. The irony wasn't lost on her that they were in the backroom that was Steven's, but of age or

not, they didn't want to get caught and have their moment ruined. They waited YEARS to connect like this and

neither one of them would deny the other.

"You know Jackie, we don't do things the normal way." Eric was intoxicated by the scent of her strawberry

shampoo.

"Such as?"

"We pined for each other, spent too long apart, and now we finally had sex, and we still didn't even go on our

first official date yet!"

"You can ask me…."

"Jackie, do you want to go out with me?"

"You mean like on a date?"

Why not have fun with this?

"Would you like to go to the Vineyard tonight?"

"Sure…but right now," she kissed him on the neck, "I'm hungry. Let's go upstairs and have some lunch?"

Jackie wrapped a sheet around her so she could find her clothes on the floor.

"That sounds good. Kitty was in the middle of making me a roast beef sandwich. You don't think she knows….."

Eric looked for his underwear.

"Your mother isn't stupid."

"Oh God…what is she going to say?"

"What can she say? Would you zip my dress?"

"Sure, m'lady."

When they finished getting dressed, Jackie held Eric's hand as they walked upstairs.

_"I love you, Jackie."_

He was finally able to say it, with no repercussions. They were both able to have the relationship that they

wanted and on their own terms. Their future seemed full of endless possibilities.

_"I know."_

_*Eric's Chicago bordem led him to finally reconnect with Jackie. _

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